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… They're not traumas. Not really.
[ The fact of the matter is that the worst case scenario literally didn't happen. Things could've gone so much worse, but they didn't, and that alone is what buoys him back to the surface. ]
I'll talk even if you don't feel comfortable sharing your own. I do wonder what's going to happen now that most of us have gone through the experience.
[ The fact of the matter is that the worst case scenario literally didn't happen. Things could've gone so much worse, but they didn't, and that alone is what buoys him back to the surface. ]
I'll talk even if you don't feel comfortable sharing your own. I do wonder what's going to happen now that most of us have gone through the experience.
[
this is so hard, actually, even as someone who thinks himself to be fairly open. but he's aware that if he doesn't answer, then tokinaga won't, and then he'll lose his chance and tokinaga will never open up again and also this road ends with tokinaga hating him, somehow,]
To "deserve better", that implies some sort of standard to be met, some unconditional affection that should be given, but... [a light frown.] I don't doubt that my mother cared about me, but I suspect she wouldn't have had me if she had the choice, and my father only liked me as a weak and pathetic "pet" he could dote on. My siblings hate or ignore me for being half-commoner.
[...]
You said it was brave to aim for the throne even if it meant attempts on my life, but it's the other way around. The only way I was going to survive was if I gained allies, and to do that, I had to be useful enough for my existence to have "value" to others.
... So rather than deserve better, I have had it impressed on me all my life that I don't deserve anything in the first place—not unless I have earned it.
this is so hard, actually, even as someone who thinks himself to be fairly open. but he's aware that if he doesn't answer, then tokinaga won't, and then he'll lose his chance and tokinaga will never open up again and also this road ends with tokinaga hating him, somehow,]
To "deserve better", that implies some sort of standard to be met, some unconditional affection that should be given, but... [a light frown.] I don't doubt that my mother cared about me, but I suspect she wouldn't have had me if she had the choice, and my father only liked me as a weak and pathetic "pet" he could dote on. My siblings hate or ignore me for being half-commoner.
[...]
You said it was brave to aim for the throne even if it meant attempts on my life, but it's the other way around. The only way I was going to survive was if I gained allies, and to do that, I had to be useful enough for my existence to have "value" to others.
... So rather than deserve better, I have had it impressed on me all my life that I don't deserve anything in the first place—not unless I have earned it.
Two things can be true, you know. You can have made the decision out of necessity, and still be brave to do it.
And it feels like you've done a lot to earn it, from my eyes. As a person that doesn't know anything much at all about royal tensions and having to play crowds that way, anyway. I don't have any bias for that.
And it feels like you've done a lot to earn it, from my eyes. As a person that doesn't know anything much at all about royal tensions and having to play crowds that way, anyway. I don't have any bias for that.
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